Monday, July 28, 2008

Smoking

Only assholes become smokers or smoking makes you become an asshole.

Have you ever been eating at a restaurant on the patio, and someone sitting at a nearby table gets up, drops trow and blasts a shit-storm of diarrhea in your face?

Of course not, decent human beings don't do that. But a smoker would not hesitate to light up a smoke while you are eating. Smokers are not decent human beings.

It is questionable whether smokers are in fact human beings. Most humans value their lives, but smokers like to say "We all gotta die sometime". This is true. We will all die. Smokers will most likely die of preventable lung cancer hacking up blood in a hospital.

A smoker can't conceive that their disgusting flaw isn't the coolest thing you have ever seen.

Smoking causes limp-dickedness. Smokers don't need erections cause they enjoy flaccidity and would rather be smoking than fucking anyway.

That being said,

I will only visit you in the hospital to say "I told you so"

1 comment:

  1. Rachel7/30/2008

    You should tell the smokers what you really think!!! None of this pussyfooting around the issue :)

    ReplyDelete